I think the title pretty much gives it away. But, yes, we are having a baby! If you are regular readers of Life Unexpected, or if you follow me on social media, you will know that for us this is a complete miracle. I cannot tell you how excited I am to finally get to share this! Especially as we were told that we might not be able to have kids at all (more of that below).
I can’t believe I’m only now getting our news up on the blog. It has been a crazy few months and I genuinely just haven’t been able to come on and update. We had our 12 week scan a few weeks ago and everything seems ok. Baby is healthy and growing fine and I’m now officially 15 weeks pregnant, almost 16.
I was really hoping to get to do a special announcement with family pictures and a really cute photo shoot, but it has been impossible to do that.
Aitan is actually in hospital at the moment, having yet another whole week round of chemotherapy, so family photoshoots are completely not an option. It’s also been so long since he’s been allowed to go outside. While he’s having chemo, he can’t be in the sun. With the super hot, heatwave style summer we’ve been having, you can imagine how tricky that has been! I’m so sad he’s had to miss out on such a beautiful summer and hopefully we can make up for it in years to come!
Being Told We Wouldn’t Be Able To Have Kids
It was only a short few months ago that we shared with you our news about Aitan having cancer. It was a complete shock to us. He is so young, he is so healthy, honestly…it was the last thing we expected to hear.
I cannot describe how hard the last few months have been. I don’t think I can even put it into words. Nothing can prepare you for going through something like this. Cancer is just awful and I am in so much admiration of how positive and strong Aitan has been throughout it all.
One thing we haven’t shared with people, is that we have been sitting on our pregnancy secret from the very start. Within two weeks of finding out that Aitan had cancer, he had surgery to remove the cancerous lump. As soon as he was wheeled out of the operating theatre, the Doctors broke the news to us that the cancer had already spread to his lungs and that he would be needing chemotherapy to try and get rid of it.
At the same time, the Doctors told us that this journey was very likely to make him infertile. This was an even bigger shock and something that Aitan especially, found difficult to come to terms with.
A Surprise Discovery and A Little Miracle
Over the next couple of days I felt weird. Something just felt off with my body. At first I put it down to adjusting to the news, but for some reason I kept thinking ‘you’re pregnant Chloe’. In the end I persuaded myself to take a pregnancy test. When it came back negative, I did have a little cry. We hadn’t even been trying for a baby, but for some reason I felt like I was pregnant and that maybe that was our one hope of expanding our family.
Two days later I still felt really ‘different’. I remember having the same feeling when I found out I was pregnant with Evie. I even went out for lunch that day and the smell of wine, which I normally love, made me screw my nose up. After lunch I snuck to the shop, got two more pregnancy tests and tried again. It turned out my feelings were spot on because there they were…the two little blue lines.
The First Trimester
I cannot describe how much hope this gave us and how of a drive it has been for Aitan. Despite it being a little miracle though, I have to be honest, the first twelve weeks of this pregnancy were the worst! My pregnancy with Evie was such a breeze in comparison.
This time I actually ended up having to go to the Doctors and beg them to help me. I was experiencing severe morning sickness and fatigue. I couldn’t eat, or drink water and I was literally living off tiny crackers and lemonade (I lost a whole stone in weight – these photos were taken before all of that). Even worse, I couldn’t stare at my laptop screen for longer than a few minutes at a time. Not a good thing when suddenly you’re the breadwinner because you’re partner is sick. Even more frustrating being self employed and knowing that you literally cannot afford to take time off work.
At the same time as this Aitan had started chemotherapy. The irony was he was feeling exactly the same. I cannot tell you the amount of nights we’ve both sat up in the early hours, feeling sick, tired and only able to munch on crackers.
I finally started to feel normal again around 12 weeks and thankfully, apart from the odd reoccurrence here and there, morning sickness and fatigue is finally behind me. Hooray!
The Second Trimester – Cravings + Gender
I feel so normal right now and I am really, really happy! I can work again, I can be there fully for my family, and I even went to gym this week and it was amazing being back doing exercise again. Even better, my appetite has fully come back and I have been having the funniest cravings!
All I have been wanting is Branston pickle. I have been eating it with everything. Another thing I keep craving…chicken wraps and another…ice cream! But, the weirdest thing so far has been cheesy pea snaps. The cheesy pea snaps are some kids snacks that we were sent by Organix last week for Evie to try out. They’re supposed to be for toddlers, but as soon as I tasted one I just went ‘woah, I need more of these’ and honestly I cannot get enough of them. It’s so weird, I normally hate peas! Now Evie keeps getting cross because I’m constantly raiding her healthy snack cupboard. I remember wanting all sweet stuff with Evie. This time its savoury. Does that mean it could be a boy?
We will definitely be finding out the gender at our next scan, which isn’t till the end of September. Hopefully by then, Aitan should also be through chemo. Around the same time as our scan, we find out news about the cancer, whether it has gone or not. Our fingers are so crossed!
Does anyone else have any miracle pregnancy stories? Did you just know you were pregnant or was it an unexpected shock? Did anyone else have any weird cravings too, like pea puffs? I’d love to hear below!
*All photos of me were taken by the lovely Lizzie Churchill.